RIFF MARKET

EYE HATE CULTURE VULTURES

So i dont know if this comes from blog-overload, or what, but i fucking hate the lower east side. Or maybe it has something to do with horrible rumors i read on gossip sites I fantasized would one day write about me, saying i fucked some dude that wouldn’t donkey punch me with the lights out. i’m outraged. i'm outrageous. i hate myself.

alternative music is dead.

it was DOA. i think. i never tried to understand it. it's not understandable. right? i mean, even the people at the labels that can make moves and direct culture hate alternative music, and i dont blame them. just like network sitcom hipsters (omg how I met yr mother is brilliant) and seven-string guitars, this shit is ready for its grave.

btw, i dont place mcr in this category because mcr is this generation’s nirvana. not straight up sva middle class mallrat bullshit (nevar1).

maybe this post has something to do with me being drunk at the moment. maybe all the posts i've made within the past 30 minutes on various sites has something to do with how much i've drank. maybe it’s that i’m catastrophically insecure, and that i’m realizing i’m so far behind i’ll never be able to convince anyone i have a clue about music. maybe i’m the new lori majewski. but oh my god, teenagers have the worst taste in music.

HAVE ANY OF YOU HEARD OF A BAND CALLED POI DOG PONDERING!?!?1

Music did not start in 1991. Do you know that? Knowing your musical history doesn’t start with knowing who Green River was.

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, PLEASE LISTEN TO DIE KREUZEN. listen to what’s the 10 1/2. LISTEN TO MID-PERIOD BORN-AGAIN VIOLENT FEMMES!!!!! listen to stetsasonic. listen to the kingston trio. listen to codeine. LISTEN TO SOMETHING OTHER THAN WHAT YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN LISTENING TO TEN YEARS AGO BUT MISSED OUT ON BECAUSE THE DRIVING IMPULSE IN YOUR LIFE HAS ALWAYS BEEN TO BE POPULAR, AND ONCE AND FOR ALL: STOP TREATING MUSIC LIKE IT’S YOUR STICKER COLLECTION.

Labels: guest riffs