10 April 2007
LUST'S JUST A DISTRACTION
*BORAT IS NOT A GREAT MOVIE*
RIFF MARKET "I'VE SEEN IT WITH MY OWN EYES" EDITION
I'VE GOT MORE GREAT MOVIES THAN YOU'VE GOT BLACKHEADS
This past weekend I saw the movie Borat, which stars this guy who told blowjob jokes at my college graduation. I believe there were also some weed jokes, something about stealing laptops, and then some jokes about how white people don't understand black people. Anyway, I want you to imagine having to look your grandmother straight in the eye after some white guy pretending to be a black guy wearing a glossy red jumpsuit points in her direction and says "now there is a woman who gives a good blowjob." Imagine having to eat at Chili's on your graduation day because you forgot to make reservations at Pizzeria Uno's. Imagine your father ordering you a mudslide, then telling you to "slide in" (I'm pretty sure this has something to do with drinking mudslides). Then imagine watching a 90-minute movie that stars the blowjob guy from college graduation. You can probably "imagine" I'd have a few problems with that movie.
Basically my only problems with Borat were: 1) I thought the scene when Borat wrestles the fat guy in the hotel room could have been shorter; 2) the fat guy could have been fatter; 3) the soundtrack was a little weak.