RIFF MARKET

More Things Overheard At Tower Records on East 4th Street

-This is what we know so far. You start in New York. You end up in Boston. At some point you're going to be on a secret bus.

-It gets me to Beantown, I know that much. I'm not a fucking idiot for chrissakes. But my big question is, does it come back to the Big Apple? Well goddamn. Unbelievable. A secret bus. And you read about this in a newspaper you got from a plastic box on the street? Incredible.

-Hi, do you have Beantown on DVD?

-Actually, I think Fung Wah means "secret bus."

-Oh, no thank you. I'm just looking for a CD that I can listen to on the secret bus to Beantown.

-Well I guess somebody already came through here and picked up all the copies of Beantown!

-When I get up to the window, do I say "two tickets for the secret bus," or do I say "two tickets for the secret bus" in a stereotypical Asian accent? I just really don't want to fuck this one up.

-There are bathrooms on the bus.